Ferenginar’s 8 richest hold as much wealth as bottom half of all Ferengi

Ferenginar’s 8 richest hold as much wealth as bottom half of all Ferengi

MUGAR MUGA, FERENGINAR — A new report published by the Divine Treasury warns that the status of global economic inequality is far more dire than predicted, with most Ferengi failing to exploit the citizens of galactic neighbors to the extent possible since the introduction of warp travel to Ferengi society.

The report, titled Does Anyone Remember the Rules of Acquisition? estimates that just eight Ferengi share the same level of personal wealth as half of the population of 24.8 billion Ferengi who make up the “temporarily embarrassed non-wealthy” class.

That’s a sharp change from just a few years ago, when it was estimated that nearly 100 Ferengi accounted for that much wealth.

The Divine Treasury does the math every year and publishes the result for the Grand Nagus around the time that thousands of Ferengis gather for the annual gift-giving tradition, when wealth disparity is most keenly on display.

“It’s obscene that so few Ferengi are following the Rules,” said Deraxaia, a female who was among the team that assembled the report and one of first of her gender to be granted a position at the Divine Treasury thanks to the controversial reforms of Grand Nagus Rom. “Nearly the entire galaxy is begging for the products and services only Ferengi can provide, and yet the past 150 years of warp travel have seen few grab these opportunities by the lobes. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all,” Deraxaia said, quoting Rule 18.

Indeed, it’s estimated that just 5 percent of Ferengis ever leave the planet, eschewing Rule 75: “Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of latinum.”

The disparity presented in the report is a worrisome portent of future trends, according to Zrarad, a professor of wealth and profit at Zyras University. “If the Grand Nagus wants a healthy capitalist economy, he should do more to ensure that more wealth comes to Ferenginar,” Zrarad said. “A rising tide soaks the swamp,” he added.


So who are the eight richest Ferengi?


Most have made their fortunes off-world, and several have pledged to take their wealth to the grave. Here’s a look at who they are:


Igerin, founder of SSSB, stands atop the list with his hands triumphantly in the air. He recently purchased the small moon of Endor.


Zylat Bruno Zrarad, who uses three names when most Ferengi get by with just one, opened his first fashion store in 2365 on Ferenginar but earned his place on this list when he pioneered the female fashion industry.


Kral, chairman of Horad Hrabac investments.


Ozavak, the Ferengi head wrap magnate.


Gorago, founder of Slug Swamp, the ubiquitous world-holonet marketplace.


Lebac, youngest to ever be considered among the wealthiest, he got his start swindling colony settlers out of a fair return on their mining rights.


Sopum, who took the First Rule of Acquisition most seriously in founding the faulty isolinear chip empire that undid the Borzarean Impirium.


Bruza, former mayor of Mugar Muga and founder of the mud-harvesting and export business that bears his name.

 

About Goraxac

Goraxac is a senior reporter with the Daily Profit, living in Mugar Muga, Ferengi. He is always on the lookout for passive income business ventures and a wife.

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